I discovered this one principle:
We seem to attract the things that we focus on
We attract the behaviour, the situations, … the kind of relationship that we focus on.
Would you agree with me?
Let me tell you a quick story why I think this is true.
I was going for a beer with a friend of mine
And he told me about his marriage
And he kept on going on about his frustrations with his wife
And all the things that she does NOT do, although he asks her for them
And all the things that she IS doing that are making him mad all the time and she knows it, and she’s still doing them.
And he kept describing all those situations and feelings and emotions that he does not want
And he was so passionate in telling me about it.
He kept telling me about all the things that are bad in his relationship, all the things that he does not want.
I think he was going on for like 20, 30 minutes.
And you can imagine, that his mood was really getting worse every minute.
And I told him – “Well, you now told me all the things in your relationship that you DON’T want. You seem to know exactly what you DON’T want.
What are the things that you DO want in your relationship, specifically?”
And he stopped. And after talking for these 30 minutes, he was quiet. And didn’t speak for maybe 2 minutes or so.
And then he said “Well, I haven’t really thought about what I want in detail.”
So listen – here’s something that has amazingly transformed my own relationship
and my own life:
Instead of focusing on all the bad stuff in your relationship, all the things that you do not want, here’s what I want you to try today:
If you’ve got a few seconds for yourself,
Just close your eyes
Think of a moment in your relationship that you can feel incredibly grateful for
It can be a moment where you felt complete, unconditional love from your partner
Or a sexy moment, a passionate moment
Any moment in your relationship that you can feel grateful for, and that can bring a smile to your face.
And then you really focus on that situation,
focus on that picture in your mind,
Try to make the picture vidid, emotional.
Feel into it.
Don’t just do it in your head, feel it all over your body.
And feel that
This is what you want
This is what you want to feel
This is what you want to experience.
And then, just let go of the picture in your mind, and continue whatever you’ve been doing
And remember that you can always go back to that place, to that memory, to that feeling of to being grateful.
Try this out now, just for a few seconds.
And feel that effect that it has on you.
If you like this idea, then please share this post with your friends and family members who might find it useful, too.
And you want to get more relationship techniques and a full guide on how to bring the passion back, click here to download the PassionBack guide for free.